Everyone Makes Mistakes! Growth Mindset & Instilling Resilience in Your Children Even If It Doesn’t Come Naturally To You
When I first graduated from college, I was working as a nurse in children’s hospital. I was young, impressionable (a.k.a. green), and had a hard time trusting myself as a nurse.
After working for about a year in the children’s hospital, I left that job to move home. I know that moving home was God’s will for my life. But instead of leaving my job feeling more confident and like I had grown, I left fearful. I had no desire to ever return to the hospital to work. Sometimes I even wondered if I had made the wrong decision as a profession.
A New Start & The Same Old Fears
I took a job in our local school system as a nurse and loved it! But several years later, an opportunity came up for me to return to work in a hospital during my summers off. I was initially excited! It was in labor and delivery and I would be doing mostly postpartum and nursery. But as the time approached for me to start my first shift, I was terrified!
All of the anxieties that I had when working in the hospital before came flooding back! Before I started that first day, I printed 2 Timothy 1:7 on a card and carried it in my pocket. The first day went great and I carried that card with me to work for months after that.
Facing My Fears
That scripture and a lot of prayer helped me face my fear, and I could see God’s hand guiding me in my workplace. I made some wonderful friendships and learned a lot in the years that I worked there. Although it was hard, I’m so thankful that I didn’t allow fear and self-doubt to keep me from trying something new. Everyone has some amount of fear, buy it’s important to not let fear keep us from striving toward our goals!
Trying To Be Perfect…and Failing!
When I first became a nurse, I felt like something was wrong with me because I didn’t know EVERYTHING! I felt like a failure for having to ask questions, and if I ever made a mistake, watch out, I was down for the count! I had other friends who were nurses and they seemed to take so much in stride, but every little misstep seemed to paralyze me!
In hindsight, I realize that I was unreasonably hard on myself. It has taken me many years to help me see that EVERYONE makes mistakes, and no one knows the answer to everything. It takes a much bigger person to admit when we don’t know the answer than to just pretend that we do!
Light-Bulb Moment: It Doesn’t Have to Come Naturally
Last year, I was able to attend a really awesome training on Growth Mindset. The idea of Growth Mindset was developed by Carol Dweck after studying how people handle challenges. What she has learned is that we learn thru mistakes. We actually learn so much thru our mistakes, not just our successes! We only fail if we quit!
This was so eye opening to me! I saw myself so clearly in the fixed mindset. “If people see that I don’t know what I am talking about, they will think I’m a failure!” But now, I am trying to retrain myself to understand that if it doesn’t come easy, that doesn’t mean that I can’t or shouldn’t try. It’s wonderful news to me that growth mindset can be learned! Oh how I wish I had understood this concept sooner!
Learning Grit
Some people have a growth mindset or mentality innately, and those people tend to thrive. They have what is called “grit”! This is something that I want be able to help my children develop. Sometimes I see in them the sticktoitiveness that I don’t always have when things get tough. And other times, I see the frustration that comes when things don’t just come easy. It really makes us want to quit!
What a wonderful thing to realize that we really can do anything! We aren’t bound only by our natural abilities and gifts. Sure some may more naturally take to music, but that doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t try. It’s OK if it takes some effort, as long as we have the desire to learn.
Tom Brady has become the winningest Quarterback in NFL history. His coach Bill Bilichick recently said in an interview with CNBC that:
He’s not a great natural athlete, but he’s a very smart, instinctive football player… Nobody’s worked harder than Tom. He’s trained hard. He’s worked hard on his throwing mechanics. He’s earned everything that he’s acheived, It wasn’t always there.”
None of this discounts the greatness of Tom Brady as a Quarterback, on the contrary, it shows his drive and GRIT!
And it’s important for us to recognize the flip side, that just because something comes to us easily, doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t put effort into it! We can coast by and let others with less natural talent surpass out abilities or we can keep working on bettering ourselves!
Becoming Growth Minded Mothers
I think this is such an important concept for us as mothers as well as for our children. We know that our children will learn more from us by example than us just what we say to them. This makes me want to “Press On” as the Bible says, when things get hard. If not only for myself, but as a way of demonstrating to my children that it’s important to keep trying!
God Is Growth Minded
And a Christians, we know that God is in control. However, God has also given us gifts and desires that He wants us to use for HIM! Of course as always, we can’t do everything (and we shouldn’t try to)! But we can look to Him for guidance and strength to push thru when we are walking in His will!
Scripture for Growth
The Bible is filled with encouragement about pressing forward and not giving up! As we look ahead to what we want to be able to accomplish and have our plan in place, let’s fill our minds (and maybe even our pockets) with God’s Words of blessing and encouragement just for us! Maybe what we need to stick to our goal of losing that 10 pounds or keeping to a budget is God’s reminders that “We can do all things thru Him who strengthens us!!!”
To download scripture cards for encouragement and growth in the new year or anytime, check out my Resource Library! You gain access to these great scripture cards and a whole lot more by being part of The Sweetest Part community, you can do that by signing up for my free newsletter below!
What helps you to hang in there when things get hard? Do you find your children giving up easily or enjoying a challenge? What have you done that has encouraged your children to persevere? Please share your ideas with us!
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